When I Get Old...

I may have decided of living the rest of my life single. It's fun to be alone and I feel I'm happy now. I don't need to think of other people meddling in my business that's for sure. I wish I have the luxury of all the monies in the world that just would really take my life into endless surprises.

But, when I grow old, what would be my life be? I have no one to take care of me, but myself. When I get sick, who would send me to see a doctor, but myself. When I feel alone, who would I call to me make me laugh, but myself.

Do I need to get old? Or life would just bring me to somewhere else called heaven even before I can't take care of myself, even before I can't carry myself to see a doctor, or even before I can't find someone to talk to. What will be my life in a few years time? In 5 years? 10 years? 15 years? 20 years? or would I even go that far?

I decided to write this because I feel alone today. Not wanting to talk to someone, not wanting to care of my health even I'm sick today, not wanting to go see a doctor when I need to. My life is like this right now. It's just a never ending cycle of my life that doesn't make me feel any bit happy.

When I grow old, I just wish I would now. But I need to wait if I will grow old.