Living Independently

I learned how to live independently at a young age, having my parents allow me to do all the things that I have done as a kid. I learned so much things by discovering by myself, whether it was good or bad. I never asked to live independently, I just did. It was a decision I made a long time ago. Of course, I had a help from my parents who gave me the freedom that I needed to be who I am today. Though there are rough times of being alone, I made myself stronger in mind and have the willpower to overcome my challenges by myself.

What made me today is what I experienced in the past, I made mistakes along the way, I turned negatives into positives, I sacrificed a lot of things to be who I am today. So, what made me who I am today (living independently)?

1. Training from my parents. At a young age, I was given the freedom to be who I want to be, to be where I want to be, to do what I want to do. Of course, in the right way. I can say I am a spoiled son, not a brat. I was given all the things without me asking. The only thing I asked my mother to do something special for me is food (I am a picky eater). Well, I also asked for 1 shoe that I really liked from my mother. I didn't ask her for things or luxuries I wanted. Then one thing I asked my father, was to have a basketball court at our backyard... and that's it. Well, I checked all my school field trips and just asked my dad to sign. So, I was given the freedom that I needed to be independent, it was a great training. Why with the freedom? I did well at school, without my mum and dad asking me to study hard and have good grades. I was not the smartest, but I did pretty well. And my reward, the things they bought me (which I don't ask for).

2. Discovering new things by myself. Yes! I learned a lot from experience. I learned things from reading. I learned things from the mistakes I have done. Most of the times, I would not ask for help for anything. I would figure it out myself, whether the outcome was good or bad, I just did. If it's bad, then I'll do something else to make a better outcome. Being the only son, I learned all boys stuff alone, play sports, play video games (which I am not good at) and all sorts of things. Of course, other things I learned it with my cousins and friends. But, most of the things, I just did by discovering by myself. It is always a great accomplishment when you do things independently, it makes you more confident in dealing with other things in the future. It's just a great feeling!

3. My relationships. I never had too many relationships in my life. Being independent, I learned to live alone and love it. But there are times that I long for someone in my life. So, I did, though they didn't last, I learned that whether you are scared to be independent or you chose to be independent, at times, you would need to long for someone. This is true, when you just lost the love of your life (of course), or just when you sit alone and quite is there. You will think, I need someone to make me feel happy. Being independent, doesn't mean you will be alone, it just means that you can deal with your life without the need of someone else. There would be times that your friends will be there to help you, but it will not be every time.

4. Having the right mindset. Working for almost 10 years outside the country and only having a handful of friends throughout these 10 years, I learned to do things on my own. Most of the people working abroad will always say that they miss their home, they want to go back, they just can't take the loneliness. But, am I the only person who don't miss home? Am I the only one who don't want to come back? Well, there might be as it is just having a right mindset. I'll be totally honest, I seldom miss home (when I was away for my first year outside the country), again I have feelings as well, I can be lonely, but it's not every day that I miss home. Now, I don't even miss home. People might say, I am a terrible person for being like that, but what I can do, I just don't miss home. I think, even I was in the Philippines, I studied away from our house, and I had a place, I worked in Manila and I had my own place. So, it just grew on me that I am always away from our house.

5. Enjoying the moments of being independent. I go to malls alone, I eat alone, I go to movies alone, I do a lot of things alone and I feel happy of what I am doing. I don't have commitments of what time to go out, what time to eat, what time to go back home, I always have the luxury of doing things on my own time. One of the best experiences of being independent, is travelling alone. People say that I should bring someone when I travel, but the experiences of travelling alone is just exciting. Like I said, if you are travelling alone, you would not need to think of someone's time and even what you will be doing. You can do what ever you want to do at what ever time you want to do it. Imagine this when you are travelling with your girlfriend at a beach, if for example on that day, you really want to jet-ski and your girlfriend want to do diving, so what will you do? Another example, when you want to eat, you want some steaks and BBQ, but she wants to go to the seafood restaurant, so what you will do? Think about that? 

All of these experiences made me for who I am today, I am happy for who I am, I am happy that I can live by myself, I am happy living independently. Life are full of challenges and experiences, it is how you deal with it.